Wednesday, December 31, 2008
NEW YEAR's EVE!!!
Woke up...finding myself...not on my bed nor in my house. Then a recollection of last night flashed before me like a nasty vision. Didn't feel as bad as I thought I would. Head didn't throb, vision wasn't wavy and I didn't feel like a whole barrel of beer was going to explode out. Thanked and apologised to Jolyn's friend for the night before leaving with Jolyn at around 11.30am. Cabbed Jolyn to Bishan MRT before heading off for home..sweet..home. After a refreshing shower...I just died in bed till around 5pm. Met Jean, Jolyn and their friend Serene at Far East for dinner slightly after 6. But Jolyn and Serene decided to go for a pedicure before dinner! Leaving Jean and me to walk around aimlessly. Oh yeah...I felt really thirsty since after my nap. Kept drinking bottle after bottle of water...and WHOA! DID I feel bloated! Could only eat like two-thirds of my plate. Oh...I met another one of their friend, Kent, who's a really good photographer and he's Thai! haha. And he's also a damn lively joker lah!
After dinner, we headed off to The Waterhole. But it was still closed...it only opened at 8.30pm. Jean and I left them there and headed to the Backyard Bistro, which is at Mackensie Rd, to watch Clifford gig. Attendance...Andrea, Tessa, Jean, Dawn, Zac, Yvette, Alien Aaron and me. Randall and Daryl were late. Had a little Martell before leaving with Jean for The Waterhole again. Took the 65 bus...cuz I thought it would take us back to Far East. It didn't. So not cool. We alighted at the outskirts of town and walked the rest of the way. So sorry Jean...couldn't be more sorry! Stopped by at Mac's cuz Jean wanted to eat something. Does it really take 10 mins to cook a FASTfood burger? hahaha. I wouldn't know.
Met another of Jean's friends at The Waterhole. Both he and Kent are also in the Army...both are techies. Both of them were cool dudes but I was cooler....I'm ORDing alot earlier than them! hahaha. Yup. Just 6 more months till absolute freedom! haha. Treated Jolyn to a glass of 36 for taking care of me last night. Also had 3 shots of Martell before leaving with my bag for the Backyard Bistro. Left it at the bar last night and Jolyn and Jean's other friend (sorry...forgot you're name) didn't let me leave them on New Year's Eve without drinking with them! haha. But Jean was like "don't drink if you think you can't". Honestly, I didn't know what to do...I just stood there...smiling. haha. Should I take her advise and admit that I can't really hold my drink that well...or just be cool and sporting about it and just...do it. I decided to go with my instinct and just went for it! Don't worry guys...I was totally cool. Didn't puke like mad or do any shit like that.
Back to the events of the night! After paying for the 36, the Martell was already paid for btw, I went down to have a smoke with Jean, Jolyn and another one of their friends, Fuzz. He was explaining to us about a funny incident which happened at the very spot we were standing on. Shall not go into the details. Left them at The Waterhole after the smoke and headed back to the Backyard Bistro by myself. When I got there, heard people screaming and singing..something. haha. I rushed in just in time to wish everyone Happy New Year! Right on the dot too! I thought it was the coolest entrance I've ever made! haha. Arriving at the same time as the New Year! hahaha. Totally awesome!
After Clifford's last song for the night, we all headed down to Clarke Quay's China One for a little beat action! A live band played and it was damn happening lah! Will tell you all more in the next entry!
CHEERS!!! hahaha.
I love my guitar 11:59 pm♥
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Hey everyone! Thx to all those who actually bother to check out my music!! haha. I was really surprised...really. I know I haven't been updating lately...but that's only cuz I was either busy with getting my life back...or I was in camp! So yeah...I know you guys miss me and all...so here's the start of my New Year's string of entries!!
Err...where do I begin? Let's see. On the 30th, the eve of New Year's Eve, went to go check out this really cool bar with Jean. I think it was called "Chips". Met some of her really cool ROCKer friends. Haha. As a fellow musician, I felt kinda small. Cuz they really look the part...like their dress styles and killer ROCKer "bling blings"?? hahaha. We were there to help finish some beer which Jean's friends kinda over-ordered. Had about two and a half mugs before leaving for another cool bar.
This second bar was even cooler. It's called The Waterhole and it's at Far East Plaza. The bartender, Alvin, and the owner, Loon, both make killer concoctions and mixes. Had something sweet called Purple Haze...tasted really good. Definitely better than the Long Island Tea at Hard Rock. Oh...but what really killed me was the three Tequila Shots I had in a row!! It wasn't me....Jean's friend Jolyn talked me into it! hahaha. But it was all for the fun of it. Around 11pm...or something...Jean left cuz she still wasn't feeling all that well. Yeah left me behind with her havoc friends!! hahaha. After awhile...don't know how long cuz I kinda lost track of time...my visions started to blur and the whole "fireworks" began! I was really gone...I could still walk and see where I was going...but that was all. haha. Sorry Jolyn! I was suppose to take care of you...but I'm lousier at holding my drink than I thought...really pai seh. haha. Cuz although I was wasted...I could still make out what everyone was saying. Yeah...after that, Jolyn and me headed to her friend's house at Bishan. hahaha. It was really funny...well...according to them. All I can say is that they TRIED to make me do stupid stuff...but I was sensible enough that they failed. HA.HA.HA. Better luck next time guys! But I really doubt there'll be a next time though. Cuz I'm NOT getting that high again...ever!
End of New Year Day 1.
I love my guitar 11:59 pm♥
Friday, December 26, 2008
It's Boxing Day!! And why have't I felt much X'Mas spirit so far? huh...beats me. Maybe this isn't my year. With so many problems and unluckiness.
Well, at least I got to spend it with my friends. Wait...I have to confess that last part wasn't true. Sigh...I mean sure...we spent so many days and hours caroling together, singing hyms and songs together. But that was all we did. Just WORKing towards caroling and all the masses. The short get togethers we had after each house visits were spent eating or talking within the cliques. No REAL bonding. Know what I mean? The countless hours of practise...were just practise. And most of us were being so serious about it, for whatever reason, that it wasn't as fun as it was before. I mean how many of us actually tried to make practice sessions and whatever free and easy time we had...fun and really enjoyable?? I don't know about you guys, but that's where alot of my X'Mas spirit went to...all the effort and time spent trying to get ready for X'Mas. But when it came...I just had so little left it wasn't fun anymore.
Sigh...
That's the one problem about trying to be good. You give without expecting anything back. So let me ask you guys...what if you gave it everything you had...then in the end you don't get any back. Then what? I'll tell you then what! You'd feel all empty inside, all things around you would have less feeling...less meaning...or would just be...LESS. But what's more fucked up is when you see the people around you feeling the same shitty-shit-shit you're feeling! And at some point...you might feel sorry enough for them and you GIVE even more of yourself in hopes that they'll feel better. Know how losing a cherished friend feels like? How not getting back a certain feeling or sense of belonging feels like? How you KNOW things will never be the same again? And from here on out, the only thing left for you is to...continue giving. That's how I feel now. It's like I KNOW who or what I am now...and I don't like me.
Oh. You HAVE to check these songs out.
Jumper [Third Eye Blind]
When It Rains [Paramore]
Miracle [Paramore]
CrushCrushCrush [Paramore]
Jumper is the song Jim Carrey sang with a guitar to the suicidal man in the movie [Yes Man]. Well, at least we can be glad music is still the same...and we can always count on music to cheer us up a little. Happy Holidays!
I love my guitar 6:15 pm♥
Monday, December 22, 2008
End of Here We Come A Caroling Episode 2! Here's my thoughts so far.
Day 1
Had a bad start cuz the red polo tee I bought ended up being a little too big for me in my slim jeans. Didn't think I look good. That's a very important thing to me. To look good. Cuz apparently my personality sucks. I'm only affected by this cuz I really think it's true. But anyway, had a little rough time during the warm up in Room 7. I just don't know why, but I'm just not remembering my parts like I used to. Old man don't-shift-the-fan-and-play-too-loudly just made it worst by showing up with the same old type of lecture as always. But the funny thing was...I saw abit of Christmas Spirit magic working. He was friendly-ish about it with smiles and soft thank yous which I think most of you guys probably don't remember. He'd usually just budge in and start lecturing us with as stern a face as he could manage..and his lectures would be long. It was moderately short this time. To some of you who are probably thinking it...NO...I don't do suck ups and I still don't like him.
Of all the 4 places we went to, I thought the house with just the couple and baby was our down point. NOT because of the turn out or our singing, but more cuz of what I so crudely and really embarrassingly said. "SO FEW PEOPLE?? WE SING FOR FUCK?!?!". I mean...what WAS I thinking saying something like that so loudly?? I hope the couple didn't hear that. I think everybody deserves to have a special and fufilled Christmas experience no matter how small or fucked up they may be. I was just being such a jerk and I really hate it. I could've ruined somebody's Christmas saying such comments and I felt so fucked up. My only consolation was that I didn't repeat my mistake at the rest of the places we went to.
But that wasn't all I felt fucked up about. I was given this in-charge-of-the-bus thing...but I feel that I've just let Dawn down by doing a bad job at it. I was the one who's suppose to guide the bus driver on the route to take...I think. I was just being...loud...and making a fool out of myself on the bus.
I'm just glad my friends had fun.
Day 2
Since I only got ONE red top (sigh...I got too fat for the other red striped tee), I decided to try it on with my baggy jeans instead. Didn't really help. So I fucked it and left my house. Met the rest below Tessa's block. Saw a NSman doing pull ups and made weird faces at him cuz he was doing pull-ups....worm style. Then I stopped, thinking how many I could do myself. Didn't even dare to try. Wimp.
Oh...and I blabbed out something stupid again. This time, at Tessa's house. As we went on our rounds wishing everybody "Merry Christmas", I just said out loud "I'M SICK OF THAT PHRASE!" after wishing the last guy. How more ambarrassing can I get?!?!?! It wasn't even funny. Dumbass. A real pain in the ass Dumbass. I also mentioned that 1/4 Malay thing out loud in the bus. I think the Malay bus driver took it in a bad way. Maybe that's why he took those long routes and wrong turns. For all his troubles, I didn't even get him a drink!
This Christmas Season really isn't working out for me. Sorry guys. And I'd like to apologise to Aaron for making fun of him and calling him Squidward and instead of working with him the Tenors' parts, I left him out. What a hopeless leader and lousy friend am I. And I'm sorry Andrew for making fun of your tallness and very low voice. But I'm most sorry to Nick for saying that fuck your mother thing...I was being too tactless. I apologise. I reflected on myself on the bus ride home. What is with me today? Am I like this all the time? Is this why my personality sucks?? Is this why girls don't like me? Sigh...
Best house was the 3rd house. Or as the guys call it, The OCS [Officer Cadet School] House (cuz we remembered the Officer Ceremonial Sword from last year). I thought we sang most clearly, blended-ly and confidently there.
Hope the rest of Christmas gets better. Why the hell am I in such a sour mood??
I love my guitar 1:58 am♥
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Today's the very first day of our caroling rounds. Have to be in church by 4pm. 4 houses to spread joy and the Christmas Spirit to. Hope I can find abit of real happiness and that Christmas Spirit for myself this year.
I love my guitar 12:14 pm♥
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Funny thing just happened...I was reading someone's blog and I stumbled across a not-too-shabby song, which led me to an album's worth of really nice songs from the same band! Something I'd never thought was possible...especially from this particular person. Why was I even there in the first place?! It's like those hypnotizing-fly-zapping-light things...and I'M the freakin fly!
Anyway, I've been looking through the purple-with-all-the-chords-and-stuff hymn book looking for a familiar song title from the appendix. Then it hit me! I'm..kinda..really..bad with titles and names. So even if I DID came across a song I knew, I wouldn't even know I knew it! So I did what was the next best possible solution which came to mind. I went through EVERY page from the first song. And while I was at it, I realised the percentage of Catholic songs, just in this ONE book, I actually knew. 3%...give or take.
Meeting Andrea and Zac tomorrow...no..I mean later...to discuss about our Advent Event. Oh and COLLEEEEEEN!!!!!! WHERE ARE MY MALACCA PHOTOS?!?!?!?!?!
Better get some sleep now. Cheers!
I love my guitar 3:39 am♥
Monday, December 15, 2008
Hi all!! If anyone of you didn't already know, I'm back from Malaysia..Truly..bleh bleh bleh...yeah quite sick of that freakin tune!! And I can't seem to get it out of my head!!
You know, if there's ONE thing Malaysians can do to improve themselves for the sake of the whole WHOLE world....it would be to take bloody English Classes. I mean for heaven's sake! There I was...driving along a clear summer's day...looking out for signs of tolls, restrooms, petrol, restaurants and the list goes on...but I had trouble cuz they were ALL spelled wrongly!! ON PURPOSE!! Like they WANT to be different from us even in spelling stuff!!
Then...I started to realise how much they really don't like us. I mean...not giving way when you're supposed to, only letting Maylaysians use the new Customs Checkpoint to exit J.B, bloody hell never SIGNAL before cutting into my lane SUDDENly out of NOwhere (not in a jam) and worst of all...giving me and Fonz (my brother) bloody reatardedly weird looks when we told them to speak in English (Basic), which apparently most of them can't, instead of Melayu. Simple phrases like "YES...I WOULD BLOODY LIKE MY RECIEPT BACK" and "NO...I..DON'T...UNDERSTAND...THE..DAMNED..TO..HELL.. WORDS...THAT..ARE ..COMING..OUT ..OF ...YOUR...MOUTH!! ARGH!!!" would just be stared at for a few seconds followed by yet another wave of Malay words. We had to resort to hand gestures and at some point even FACIAL EXPRESSIONS!!! Like..."I don't like you! BLEH!" [The All Blacks war face]. hahaha. No lah...didn't feel immature enough to bother doing that shit to them. I'll just set off a War which S'pore will not win anyway and I don't mean militarily.
Have you ever thought what would happen to our puny little island if Malaysia sent just HALF of it's total population to migrate to S'pore. That's a few billion people taking in our freash air and giving out farts and stinks. Taking our Botanical Gardens and Nature Reserves as places to build their squatter settlements and our beaches and even SENTOSA as fishing kampongs and sites to set up their countless pirated DVD "outlets". Our air will soon smell like Malaysia. Our currency will drop by more than half. Our first language would be Malay as they would be the majority. We would all start refering to each other as "Ah Bung". And worst of all, we would all be stupid and thinking that spelling stuff wrongly on purpose is...cool!! I mean WTF?!?! They would be taking over S'pore from the inside!
Sigh.
Anyway, there's the St' Stephen's Feast day celebration coming up. And my band really wants to play...but I have freaking Guard Duty (which I'm trying to sell) on that day. But even if I managed to sell my duty, there's caroling that evening. So either way, my band can't perform our pop. HOWEVER, we are still doing our praise and worship for the Youths who are under us. For our friends who were there from the start. For friends who have been through just so much together. Friends who will never WANT to break away...at least not anytime soon. haha. We've discussed it and thought the 27th would be an ideal date for it. And oh!...to Andrea and Zac...I've found the freakin purple hymn book with all the chords and stuff. It was infront of me the whole time!! Fancy that! I'll go through the book and see if I come across any nice tunes we know.
okok...should stop offending people and get some rest now. Will show you guys the cool tees I bought in Malacca...no...they're not pirated. Cheers!
I love my guitar 3:02 am♥
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Up early in the morning doing freaking COS duty again. I'm suppose to be out with Nick and Zac to jam abit. I'm suppose to be in my cozy bed NOW. I'm on leave on Wednesday. But I've got COS duty which is 24 hrs on Tuesday. You do the Math. I've to wake up to do cook house duty at 5.15am later. Left with3 hrs of sleep. The last time I did breakfast duty, I spent most of the time sleeping while standing, leaning against a wall. My knees kept buckling and I almost collapsed to the floor quite a few times. A..funny...sight indeed. HA.
The things I do for money...sigh.
Just got my pay...again. I remember how I used to struggle to make ends meet last time. Now...I just store it all up till I need to use it...again. Know what I mean? Of course you don't! And I wouldn't have it any other way. ha. ha. ha.
Gonna be freaking free from tomorrow onwards till Boxing Day. Two words. Block Leave.
This kinda pisses me off. But from next week till Boxing Day, which is 2 weeks, my company is having block leave. Meaning, EVERYone gets to have a short 2 week holiday...and those who have outstanding OFFs or LEAVEs, are forced to clear them during this period. Those who don't have any to clear? well THEY get what we call here..Magic Off. It's basically off that poofs out of nowhere!! And THEY get it! ME? I've got 13 days of leave to clear, so 10 days are cleared during the block leave, and the remainding 3, I cleared on the Wed, Thurs and Fri of this week. If you count correctly...which I have no doubt you have a problem with...I don't get a single freaking Magic Off!!! Like WTH!! or a kid would say "NOT FAIR!!!".
I kinda miss you.
Well, gotta get some sleep. Don't wanna "die" in the middle of the cook house later. Cheers!
I love my guitar 1:53 am♥
Monday, December 08, 2008
Biao Bai [Elva Hsiao]
You guys should check this song out. It's Chinese. And I realise that some of you might think...what the hell am I doing listening to a Chinese song!!
I know!! I know!! But I came across this song while on YouTube. I was searching for hot-asian-female-singers...cuz I just felt like it. And I came across this song. And NO! I'm NOT a perverted freak...cuz they don't permit explicit sex videos on YouTube...if you didn't know. Although I didn't bloody know the lyrics...or the meaning behind the lyrics for that matter...I got captivated by it's rhythm and beat...and the way she sang the song. The whole entourage just intrigues me...especially the beat at the bridge. Just soo....alluring? but yeah...the singer IS quite pretty...in certain shots. haha.
Oh and Biao Bai means confession. No again...I didn't bother to check for the meaning. The meaning was in brackets next to the title. haha.
It's a bitch to keep having to go back to the YouTube web page to restart the song...over and over again. But for music...anything goes.
Me and the rest of the choir sang carols in church yesturday evening to promote the Jubilate Choir as we're going on our caroling rounds...like we do every year. Had to wear RED. My only red t-shirt was freaking small...I wonder what I was thinking when I bought it. Didn't like the colour...didn't like the t-shirt. Then this morning, had to wear the choir tee. It was my kinda colour. Design wasn't bad as well. But again...what's with the freaking small size?!?!?! And NO I'm not growing fat....seriously. Maybe I should start working out...more.
Another bad news. I don't think we can do a pop gig for Christmas. Like Clifford said...it just wouldn't fit into the Christmas feel everyone will be getting high on. So what other gigs are there?? Well none. Not till next year at least.
It's getting late and me eyes are shutting. Signing off now. Cheers! Keep the music alive.
I love my guitar 2:48 am♥
Friday, December 05, 2008
Guess what I'm doing so early in the freakin morning? Company Orderly Sergeant duty that's what. This duty..although it seemed so cool during my BMT days..isn't that cool after all!! It's usually done by..you guessed it! A Sergeant! And here I am doing a Sergeant's duty but getting so much less!!
And another thing. I got this duty on the first day of returning to my unit! But I guess if you look at the bright side, I can say that I've been through and FINISHed a Sergeant course, and I'm now doing a Sergeant's work! Something which I once thought was cool to experience.
Through this duty, I'm happy to say, I found new friends who helped me on my first day on the job. And I'm more respected now, cuz the work I produced...as always...turned out neat, fast and with a fake smile. haha.
Early this Wednesday, I spent my day rather productively. I jammed more songs than I planned with my band's lead singer ZAC. And they all..somehow by chance or skill..turned out GREAT!! I...no...YOU guys have something to look forward to now. Cuz we're planning something for Christmas. And though we still got work to do and parts to work out and improve, the prospects couldn't turn out any better! Finally...something good is finally coming my way. Just a few more hours before I can catch a few needed winks of sleep...just hang in there.
Oh...and Dawn has made me in charge of transportation for this year's caroling rounds. Oh dear, I hope I'll be able to pull it off...don't wanna make you guys have to walk instead. ha. ha. ha.
Learned a new guitar Lead technique from one of my Army mates just now. I can only get better from now on...someone even praised me for being able to play well! I'm actually feeling a little tiny bit more accomplished. Cuz there are really good guitarists here...really good.
Well see you guys tomorrow after I book out. As in like to hang out...not just for choir and mass. Hopefully something can be arranged....hopefully. Cheers!
I love my guitar 2:35 am♥
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
My 13 days-long off is ending soon. I've to book in tomorrow night actually. Sigh. I planned to spend this long off differently. So differently. I'm not suppose to feel like I've just wasted a perfect...long break from the Army...from the world. I was suppose to spend every single day wishing every single day wouldn't end. But I guess you can say it wasn't meant to be. I guess you can say we were just not fated. Sigh. So how now little brown cow? All our meaningful plans which were meant to blossom into one of our most unforgettable times together...just faded into nothing...not even memories. I was suppose to go back to camp not regretting anything. Not feeling a sad sense of lost. Not feeling like life has no meaning again.
And there you thought it was the right thing to do.
But apparently, it wasn't. At least I will admit that it wasn't the right thing for me.
Then again, maybe this is all just crazy talk. Maybe all I need is a hug. But definitely not from a guy or anyone of my female friends. It just wouldn't feel right (no offense to you girls...it's not you, it's me). Not even a hug from anyone of my family or God even, can warm my heart again. I just don't know anymore. I don't know what to look forward to nowadays. I don't know how to cheer my lonely self up like I used to.
Weekends aren't that...colourful...anymore. The things I do...I used to have so much motivation to do them. I guess none of you guys will ever understand, not even when you say you've been through so much more than me. Know why? Cuz you're not me. And you'll never be. And yes, the whole world has gone through so much more and yet here it still is right?? But there are also people who freakin' killed themselves over lesser things! So where do I belong?
I belong to a special minority in this world. A minority who feels like we got the bad end of a deal and like we were misunderstood and now...we're suffering for it. Suffering cuz we had hoped so much that it was really for the best that what ever happened..happened...but now it doesn't seem like it. Now it seems so wrong and we're just feeling so terrible inside that we can't do fucking SHIT about it!!!
Sigh. Where is all the mercy...I think we need some right now.
I'm suppose to hang out with a couple of the guys tomorrow. But looks like I can't even do that! I've to freakin' book in tomorrow night...and if SHIT like this continues to happen to me, I'll be further apart from my friends as well for goodness sakes!! omfg...I need a smoke. I really need at least one now.
Where's this girl that's supposedly out there for me??? Oh would I even freakin' bleed for her right now. Just to hear her say those three heart-melting words.
I'm so pathetic aren't I....sigh
I love my guitar 11:34 pm♥
